# My Ford jokes thread



## #1DEER 1-I

Ya I'm gonna push the envelope a little harder....



> A man pulled up next to a little girl walking home from school and said "If you get in, I'll give you a lollypop." The girl kept walking.
> 
> Following along slowly, the man said "Come on and get in the car with me and I'll give you two lolly pops." She kept her eyes on the sidewalk and continued on her way.
> 
> The man said "Get in with me and I'll give you this whole bag of lollypops!" Finally, the girl turned and said "Look daddy, YOU bought the Ford, YOU ride in it!!!"





> Buy a Ford and you buy the best.
> Drive the first mile and walk the rest.





> From the past 10 years about 90% of Ford trucks are still on the road, the other 10% made it home.





> Ashes to ashes,
> dust to dust.
> If it wasn't for Fords,
> our tools would rust.





> The people who say they would rather push a Ford than drive a Chevy usually do.





> Why are the new Ford trucks more aerodymic?
> 
> So they will save the Chevy gas when the Chevy tows them away.





> Next time some Fordnatic claims Ford means "First on race day" remind them that anything could be fast if a team of mechanics worked on it all week so it would last long enough to run a race before needing another weeks work.





> Do you know that Ford has admitted they are expensive and unreliable? That new commercial they are running says so! When that country singer says "If I had me some money" he admits he can't afford one, and when he adds that he'd "buy a Ford truck or two" it because he needs a spare.





> I went to a couple of car dealerships last week, and the first one I stopped at was Kia, well nothing caught my eye, but the price was right, then I went to a Ford dealer, again nothing really caught my eye, but I looked anyway, then I go to the Chevy dealer, well I see one that I like, the dealer does the once over with me, then he pops the trunk, disapointed, I looked at the dealer and said, "Well, Theres something missing" the dealer ,puzzled asks "What"? I said "at the ford dealership I checked out, they had a new pair of shoes in the trunk of every car"! Smiling the dealer says "Thats so they can walk home"!


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## weatherby25

This is getting old.


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## Treehugnhuntr

So, are you saying you like Chevy's Forest?


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## Huge29

Wow that is awesome; you just changed Chevy to Ford in each, that is good work for a fellar who can't use his auto wipers and fluid warmer correctly http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=148&sid=3994955 Wouldn't you know it that it would be a Chevy driver who could not think of using a visor or glasses or slow down or wipers?? Or I guess it is a good possibility that they all failed.


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## BIGBEAN

I have had about enough of this.

How big a feller are you? :lol:


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## Treehugnhuntr

:lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Huge29

BIGBEAN said:


> I have had about enough of this.
> 
> How big a feller are you? :lol:


"I'm going to be on you like Vaseline on Heath Ledger's Chaps!" Have you heard that one to the military guy?


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## wyogoob

Do I need to revive the "Ford Anti-theft Device" story again?


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## BIGBEAN

Huge29 wrote:


> "I'm going to be on you like Vaseline on Heath Ledger's Chaps!" Have you heard that one to the military guy?


I haven't heard that one. That is great. I liked the amniotic sac full of whoop A.


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## Duurty1

how about the Tacoma getting stuck in the mud, having to pull myself out with a come-along and then towing the Ford and Chevy both home.


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## bpb1

At least they circled the problem.


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## Treehugnhuntr

Ok, this is 100% true and I can back it up. We were fishing in Idaho o this last spring and took 2 vehicles, an F-350 superduty dually and a crew cab Toyota Tacoma. Long story short, we drove through a big snow back with the Tacoma and went on up the road. After about 10 minutes of waiting a few miles down the road we decided to go back and see what the H was going on. The Ford was stuck and we pulled it out with the Tacoma. In the name of POS's, amen.


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## weatherby25

> F-350 superduty dually


That has nothing to do with the Ford, but has everything to do with the dully. after owning one yes it was a Ford I will say a car is better in the snow and mud then the dully. Dullys are for weight and pulling not for being off the road or on the road in the snow for that matter.


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## Duurty1

yeah mine is true too. back in high school i hi-centered my tacoma and both the blazer and f-250 couldn't even make it to where i was. ford blew out the clutch and chevy lost a rearend and a front u-joint. that was a long 5 hours of using a comealong in waist deep mud. oh and the tacoma only had 31's while the other two had 35's


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## girlsfishtoo

Honestly....how old are we? Everyone has their own opnion and nobodys gonna change it! Get over yourselves....sheesh....this last weekend we passed 5 broken-down chevys (I should say from sunday to monday) pulled off the side of the road.....it speaks for its self! :twisted:


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## utahtu

I had to pull my neighbors F-350 off of his lawn because he was stuck.
I have a 2000 Dodge 1500 Crew-cab.
He asked me not to tell anyone - ha!


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## utahtu

Will someone ask Garyfish about his first off-road experience with his Ford Exploder?


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## GaryFish

utahtu said:


> Will someone ask Garyfish about his first off-road experience with his Ford Exploder?


I buried it to the pumpkin in the mud. My fault - not the truck. But the tow guy that got me out had to bring his Ford since his dodge was busted! I can accept you driving your dodge around. I'm OK with that. Good truck. But dude - that Hyundai I saw you in the other day? Show some dignity man!


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## orvis1

GaryFish said:


> utahtu said:
> 
> 
> 
> Will someone ask Garyfish about his first off-road experience with his Ford Exploder?
> 
> 
> 
> I buried it to the pumpkin in the mud. My fault - not the truck. But the tow guy that got me out had to bring his Ford since his dodge was busted! I can accept you driving your dodge around. I'm OK with that. Good truck. But dude - that Hyundai I saw you in the other day? Show some dignity man!
Click to expand...

Easy there fella.... I own a dodge and commute in my hyundai your hitting below the belt...


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## proutdoors

orvis1 said:


> I own a dodge and commute in my hyundai your hitting below the belt...


 -_O-


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